I went for a walk in a sheep pasture this afternoon and wondered to myself why it is that friends and acquaintances ALWAYS, without fail, marvel at how we get around by bus, while journalists NEVER ask about such pragmatic or mundane matters. Maybe the journalists already know how such things work, maybe they think their readers don’t care, or maybe it’s the fact that it’s all somewhat the same for many touring groups, so there must be nothing special about us. Maybe our friends are interested because they are completely unaware of how musical acts get around, or they think we all travel by private jets — like their image of rock stars of yore, or bands like U2 and Rolling Stones today.
Anyway, here’s how it works:
The other day we played in Amsterdam. The day after we played in London. We don’t hang around. Economics of a tour of my scale mean that I have to play a certain number of shows a week (at least four, but often more) and of a certain size (and therefore income) to be able to pay everyone’s salaries, the bus rental, the gear rental, etc etc. Budgeting is worked out before the tour begins — I sit down with some folks and look at the numbers, which tell me more or less what level of show I can do that year: how many performers to hire, if I can carry my own lights and PA or not, how many busses we can afford… all of that is determined before the tour dates are booked.
In the past, live shows were viewed as loss leaders to sell albums, but I doubt that too many folks believe that anymore… though shows do make people a teeny bit aware of a new record. Record companies who espoused the loss leader approach used to advance money to up and coming acts to cover tour losses — but I don’t know anyone who does that now.
On this tour the shows tended to be in medium-sized theaters — around 2,000 seats on average (I think). Occasionally we’d play a place quite a bit smaller (see the “Thank You U2” entry), sometimes larger, or a big pop festival that would pay better than the theaters — thereby subsidizing shows in the Balkans, for example. We traveled with 3 busses this year — one for band (which includes me), one for singers and dancers, and one for crew. Note to friends and acquaintances: I do NOT have my own bus with a big round bed in the back.
The busses have bunks in them, so that’s where most of us sleep. (Some folks have issues sleeping on the bunks — more on that later.) The bunks have their own air vents and curtains, so there is a measure of privacy — and they’re surprisingly quiet. For someone who sleeps through NY traffic noises, a bus bunk is quiet. In the US the bunks have little fold-down DVD screens! — though I’ve never used those. Rule number one: always sleep with your FEET pointing forward — if there is a sudden stop or accident you don’t want your head to impact first.
We usually have drinks backstage or at a nearby bar after the shows, say hi to friends and fans, pack up our personal stuff, and within an hour or two the busses are rolling. Sometimes we watch DVDs before we go to our bunks — The Wire or The Mighty Boosh were big favorites on our bus. During tennis season Mauro and Keith would go to a separate lounge and watch games they’d recorded on a TiVo type hard drive. There is a refrigerator and microwave, a coffeemaker and a toilet (though only number 1 is allowed). There is electricity, and this year, wi-fi!... so sometimes the common area would turn into an internet lounge. Nothing wilder going on than the tapping of little keys.
In the beginning of this year-long tour, the singer/dancer bus was more of a party bus — they put on music and danced for at least an hour to burn off the adrenaline and excitement. That doesn’t happen as much any more, though everyone still enjoys the shows.
On average we’ll roll into the next town at some Godforsaken early hour — so sometimes at 5 or 6AM the singer/dancer bus will arrive at a hotel where an arrangement has been made for very early check-in. They rouse themselves and stumble into their rooms and attempt to get the rest of a full night’s sleep. More power to them. I think they’re nuts — but whatever works.
I prefer to stay in my bunk and get my 8 or 9 hours sleep — which means that if we arrive in the wee hours, the bus driver will park at the hotel or outside the theater, plug the bus into a power source, and turn off the motor. At around 9 I’ll wake up, make some coffee, do emails, read the paper online, heat up some leftovers, and most days ride a bike (which was folded up in the luggage compartment) to the hotel to shower and shave. Then I’ll explore the town some more, maybe have a nice lunch, or go to meetings if some have been arranged, and return to the theater by 4 or 5 for soundcheck.
Dinner is provided after soundcheck — we eat backstage. Because we jump around during the shows most of us can’t eat much prior to going onstage, and we certainly can’t eat right before the shows. So as shows are often around 8PM, we can’t meet friends for dinner, and as we leave town on the busses about 90 minutes after the last note rings out, we usually don’t go anywhere to eat afterwards either.
As you can see, in this scenario we don’t spend the night in a hotel bed — though if there is a day off, we do. The hotels are booked so that we usually have to check out by mid- to late afternoon, and we never return unless it’s a day off. It’s not as bad or weird as it sounds — you get used to the pattern and sequence. And the big advantage as far as I’m concerned is that by traveling by night, one has most of the day available in each town to explore. When you wake up you’re already there. If one flies (commercial flights) then one usually has to get up early, do the whole airport rigmarole, and then one doesn’t arrive at the hotel in the new town until maybe an hour before soundcheck. It’s MUCH more draining to fly that way than to do the bus thing.
Our US busses ran on biodiesel. Not sure if the European ones did. That meant we’d book refueling appointments based on estimated fuel consumption. Local fuel tankers would meet us at pre-arranged places and times, as most gas stations don’t stock the stuff… yet. Sometimes I’d walk out of a hotel and see the little biodiesel tanker arriving in the parking lot to mate with the busses.
